runnin' the {rag}

It's the Monday after...

The weeks before Ragnar, I promised myself I would never do it again.

I dont like the stress.

I don't like the pressure.

I don't like feeling like I am juggling one more thing.

I don't like feeling selfish taking time/ money just for me.

Lisa, Leslie, Steph, Annell, Teddy, Me, Linda {our amazing driver!!}

The morning of my departure things went exactly as planned.

Children delivered to school... check

My man driving away with my 3 littles for a day/weekend of daddy fun...check

last minute hour to clean the house in silence {aka therapy}... check

decorate the house as a surprise for kiddos... check

load the 15 passenger bus/van... check

Feel completely sick to my stomach with killer nerves...check

I was happy to meet the other members of our van.

They were easy going and fun!

YESSSS!

I was even shocked to realize that some had more energy than I do!

{I knew that mixed with no sleep, adrenaline, and sugar this would be a blast!!!}

As we drove to our staring point, we were getting texts from the first half of our team

{they had begun running in the wee hours of the morning}

Each text reported how blistering hot it was there.

I, still wearing my jacket, felt that it may not be quite as dire as they were making it sound.

After all, the high was only gonna be 82 degrees.

{thats a beautiful spring day}

Getting close, we drove through dusty, dry dirt roads, I could feel the sun penetrating my clothes.

no so bueno.

My stomach knot got a little tighter.

The jacket was gone before leaving the air conditioned bliss of the car.

We stood in line to get our numbers and safety breifing.

My arms were getting more freckled every second.

We waited in the relentless sun for our runner to come in for our first relay exchange.

She came running up {like a champ} and said in her heat induced wishes...

"drink lots of water {heavy panting} it is brutal out there!!! {panting} and it's only getting worse."

Stomach knot wanted to spew its high protein contents all over the dirt.

What the bleep did I get myself into?

I watched all of the runners run their hearts out as I waited for the relay baton to be passed to me.

I watched them sweat, puke, and look like they were wandering the Sahara desert in search of water.

{I secretly hoped someone would get sick enough for them to shut down the race}

is that evil?

NO such luck.

They were all champs.

I geared up for my first leg.

{ the longest leg in the entire relay}

{that I had volunteered to run}

hydration pack, number, sunblock, ipod.

Energy sport beans.

I hoped I was ready for the run.

{about 10 miles}

at 3:30 pm.

As I waited to go, I looked at what was ahead of me.

Nothing but blacktop and barren desert for miles...and miles.

They called my number... my teammate was on approach.

The bracelet was passed and I started strong.

I had this.

I hoped my play list could keep me energized.

At mile 2 I knew this wasn't gonna be like all the times I had run before.

{in the 40 degree darkness}

I told my sweat covered self that this was a fun adventure.

{my sweat covered self thought it wasn't that fun}

I saw the mirages of water ahead of me.

And they kept moving farther away, and steadily uphill.

There was an actual water station at mile 6.

I stopped for less than a minute to rehydrate/ splash several cups down my shirt/ pants.

I wasn't making good time...at all.

I felt defeated.

This was soooo much harder than I had anticipated.

The lady at the water station could see my feelings written all over my face.

She looked at me and with as much sympathy as a stranger has ever given me she said,

"you have got this. Go kick some "A"!"

That was exactly what I needed to finish that leg.

I ran in and handed off and declared to my teamates that I chose childbirth over that.

{mind you I have a pain free epidural}

I could only hope that the following 2 legs of my race would be less dramatic...

{but in my mind I cemented the " never do this again" memo}

our saweet rental!!

{pre decoration}

our entire team

the barren wasteland.

{annell pre- puke}

watching her puke.

{obviously super nervous!}

a little van vinyl.

The sun had set while we awaited our last van member to finish her first run.

The brutal desert heat had turned to a brisk night very quickly.

Although chilly, it gave us all hope of having our next legs of the race to be better than the first.

We happily handed the baton to the other half of our team.

It was our down time!!

After driving to our hotel and eating anything we could find/ make with minimal effort, we had about an hour to sleep.

{i shared a king size bed with 2 other ladies}

{one of whom I had only met once before}

Although I knew my body desperatly needed any rest it could get, my mind ran my next race over and over again.

I layed on that bed

{next to my new bff's}

and hoped I could prove to myself that I could do bettter.

{and prayed to run the way I had trained to}

That hour seeemed to last 10 minutes.

And we were awake, putting on clean socks and mole skin.

{hair brushing wasn't even on our radar}

As we got to our next exchange I could feel the knot again, but this time it was mixed with hope...and less dread.

I watched the first 2 van members run their next legs.

Even without their reports, I could telll that tonight was different.

{a much, much better different}

Times were faster.

Strides were longer.

I had something to prove to myself.

The baton was handed to me.

It was me , the desert, and my barely there head lamp.

{conquering over 4 miles}

Everything else around me was masked in complete darkness.

{is this dramatic enough for you yet?}

I hauled tail through the night.

{I had downloaded "Eye of the Tiger" right before my run}

I ran until I felt myself wanting to slow.

As soon as that thought came, a girl cam up next to me.

{running my exact pace}

We talked for the next 2 miles about life.

{i never even asked her name}

{and in the darkness I couldn't see her face}

She kept me going the pace I wanted.

The next thing I knew, there were lights ahead.

{it was my 2nd hand off}

I said goodbye to my friend of 2 miles, and handed off to my teammate.

After looking at my phone, I realized I had just run the fastest time of my life.

It felt good.

{I wish I could've thanked that girl for being an answer to my prayer}

That run made me realize that no matter what heat the daylight brought with it, I had run the way I had trained.

{even if it was my shortest distance leg of the race}

{laying on a dented, duct taped 15 passenger van... at wee morning hours is sexy, right?}

bitter cold!

As the sun came up, we had some more down time.

We got to the hotel right as they put out the morning breakfast buffet.

I have never had better tasting oatmeal.

{or peanut butter english muffin}

We had 1 hour and 45 minutes to sleep.

Again, sleep wouldn't come.

{between my 2 bed friends}

But after laying completely still, whenI tried to get up, my body ached!

{everywhere!!!}

My thighs wouldn't let me sit down to go potty without wanted to hold onto a nearby wall.

{how on earth was I going to run 6 more miles?}

We got to fountain hills, the start of our 3rd and final legs of the race.

Annell was first.

She had the duty of conquering those stinking huge mountains.

As I watched her kick their bum, I vowed that if she, my self exclaimed "non runner" friend could do this, I could do it too.

I readied myself with all of my needed gear, ate large amounts of red vines, drank half a 5 hour energy, and I was set to go!!

{the sugar/caffeine in my body gave me more than enough ooomph}

I started running and my soreness dissapeared!

I had a gorgeous run.

{far different from the afternoon before}

I went through a scottsdale park.

Ducks, water, trees, and even...{wait for it}... sprinklers...spraying on my running path.

{tender mercy!!}

As I neared my final handoff, I looked at the man running near me and said,

"hey, guess what? we have almost run 20 miles!"

he didn't respond.

{but I was stinkin' overjoyed!}

{I had conquered the 2nd longest runner distance of the relay}

I handed off the baton and knew I had done what I came to do.

{and surprisingly had more fun than I had anticipated}

At the finishline, I was so proud of my new friends and all we had accomplished together.

{and I even let myself think that maybe, just maybe, I'd do this again!}